I’m a 21 year old college student going into my last year of college. I’ve had diabetes a little over 10 years now and I’m getting to the point where I am barely checking my blood sugar and only bolusing when I eat which is always a guess. I’ve never had an A1C over 10 but I’ve also never had one under 7. My control is slipping through my fingers and I’m getting so terrified for my future and health. I find it so hard to find motivation because I feel “healthy” and look “healthy” to others but I feel as if my body has become accustomed to always running high. Since college, I have gotten so scared of running low, that running high seems like my best option. I just don’t know what to do because I am trying to have a social life, do well in school and get into grad school, exercise and have control of my diabetes. I am always on the constant go and no matter how hard I try, I find myself falling back on trying to do my best at other things like school, exercising and being social/going out with friends.
I know I have people who care about me and love me, but I don’t want to act defeated by this disease and I know that I am ultimately the one in control of my disease and how it plays out.
This is a complete rant and I’ve had it bottled up for so long, but any advice or motivation would be so awesome from someone who understands or is going through the same things.