I feel awful!


(sarahslp) #1

I'm feeling like sh** today so this may be a rant! With T1 being autoimmune, I swear my immune system is crazy. I'm allergic to everything. I've been having stomach problems for over a year, but tested neg. for Celiac. Now, my latest problem is that I have an itchy rash spreading all over my body. It started this winter as a small spot. Over the last month, it had progressed to being everywhere. It's itchy and I of course look lovely and splotchy. So, the dermatologist has tried 4 different medicines and still can't tell what it is. She swears it doesn't look like a typical allergic rash even though that was my guess. The meds for fungus (lovely, right?) didn't work. If it was viral, it should have gone away in 6 weeks to 3 months, so unlikely. She now thinks it may be a rare form of eczema, but the steroid gel didn't help. My PCP also had no idea. So yesterday afternoon, the derm. told me she had to do a biopsy to be sure. Problem ... after doing it, she told me not to lift anything heavy for 2 days b/c it's on my shoulder and could tear the stitches. I was like, "Um, I have my 26 lb son WITH me. I have to get him from his stroller into his car seat, back out of the car, into his high chair, etc.!?" She was like, "well, bend from the kness." Gee, thanks. Then, on way way home, my body went crazy from this little incision. When I took the bandage off this morning, it didn't look infected at all, so I think my body reacted either to the incision or to the stitches. Luckily, she used non-allergenic medical tape, so I didn't get a worse rash from the bandage, lol. But, driving home w/ my son in the car in heavy traffic, I got all shaky and feverish (but had no fever when I got home). It was in the 90's, but I was shaking and cold. This morning, I still feel a little cold, and my shoulder is so sore from having to lift my son. I'm so fed up, like isn't having D enough, I can't deal with all this other cr**.


(golfpapabravo06) #2

awww here have a shoulder :)

Lets focus on the positive, how have your blood sugars been?


(paulg765) #3

Hi Sarah,

I totally understand how frsutrated and diiscouraged you feel, and yes, there are real problems which should be dealt with... and you ARE dealing with them.  Obviously, the nexxt step is to wait for the result of the biopsy and how your dematologist and/or PCP treats the condition.  Perhaps you will have to seek out a second opinion from a dermatologist who specializes in diabetic skin conditions.  Remember if one MD can't diagnose the problem it certainly doesn't mean there isn't one who can.

All that being said, you CAN do something about you mental state RIGHT NOW.  You are ruminating and living in the mindset of "this happened, and this went wrong," which is the PAST and "what's going to go wrong next?," which is the FUTURE.  All of this makes it impossible to live in the PRESENT and focus on the NOW.  So..., how do you fix it?  You have to ALLOW yourself to step back and become aware of what your mind is doing automatically.  First, take a few deep breaths and concentrate on your breathing because when you focus on your breathing you can't focus on all this negative stuff.  The perhaps enjoy just BEING with your son... in the NOW.  If your mind goes back to the PAST and FUTURE negative rumination, just tell yourself, "This too will pass."  But most important, just ALLOW yourself to be AWARE of what your mind is doing.  If you're aware of it, the whole negative illusion will collapse.


(JDVsMom) #4

I agree with Paul - you may need a second opinion. I am not diabetic but I do have eczema and while the steroid creams help - I am going thru a flare up right now for no apparent reason so I empathize with itchy rashes - they suck. In the past, I have had different steroid creams - some don't do anything, some help. So you might need to try something else (my derm said that PCPs will start you on the lightest cream and derms would start me with a middle intensity cream and could move up if it didn't help.)

I know it is hard to do but Paul is also right about focusing on what you can control and trying to let go of the rest. This is hard to do, esp if you don't feel good and all daily activities are painful. Take care.