I have now had diabetes for a little over 8 years now, and was diagnosed right before my 12th birthday. I was just writing because I am craving a little support. Craving for lack of a better word, but more than that in NEED of a little support. I come from a small town, without many type one diabetics around that I know of. My diagnosis was a surprise for my family because no one else in fact has diabetes, or even knew much about it. Therefore, I feel as though this is the best place to come with questions!
Do you all feel alone 99 percent of the time? Quoting someone on here, “Feeling alone seems like a side effect of diabetes.” This is a quote to describe my entire experience with type one diabetes. It seems as though my family feels “support,” is getting mad whenever my numbers are not within range. Or feelings angry whenever I have not been taking care of myself as much as I should be. How do you overcome this? I do not think that they realize that reacting this way, makes me more stressed out and want to give up. All I want is a little bit of community. I want to take care of myself, but sometimes I just put my health to the back of my mind as if it will just go away if I do not think about it.
Thank you all in advance for any advice. I would love to know how you all stay strong, communicate with family, and where you go for support. I also just want to know if I am the only one.
Love this diabetes community.
@littlesunflower1 Hi Katy
staying strong is not a single event. t1 is a lifelong disease so staying strong, to me, means taking it as it comes.
your parents will always see you as a 12 year old diagnosed with diabetes. that’s what happens with trauma - it stays the same age as when it first happened.
t1 is a “rare” disease all things considered there aren’t that many of us.
this site, and other volunteer work - makes the isolation less painful
NO ONE should shame you, that sucks. The people closest to you will always be scared if they think you are being injured by a high or low bs and so they migh misdirect that anxiety and actually take it out on you - your 2 choices are to always have perfect blood sugar (lie to them) or not to give out all details. you’re 20ish - why is it anyone’s business anyway?
The back-of-the mind thing can be from other priorities or it could be that it scares you too and you don’t want to think about it. This second one is dangerous because denial does a lot of damage to both your health and self-esteem.
anyway we’ve all been there. i’ve had plenty of issues with depression and with not taking care of myself.
if I can say one thing more - keep talking about it. it does help. good luck!
Hello littlesunflower! (Love that username btw). First off, props for reaching out and being so honest about how you’re feeling. That’s not always easy to do when you’re feeling alone and I often struggle to do it. Not keeping my feelings to myself is a huge part of how I work to stay strong. I also found that being kind and forgiving of myself is a big help. Ups and downs with t1d are inevitable. We all have days we just want to toss it out of our minds and call it a day. Those days are a lot easier to get through if you just remember that its doesnt mean we dont love ourselves or want to take care of ourselves or that we are not doing good enough. It just means that we are human and sometimes get tired of carrying the weight that is t1d.
I think the quote you shared, “Feeling alone seems like a side effect of diabetes” is spot on for how most of us feel. I can assure you, you are not alone in feeling alone and you are also not alone in feeling stress and pressure from your family.
Esp when I was younger I used to get a lot of the same reactions. I know it comes from a good place, they are scared and its their misdirected way of showing you that they love you. Because they don’t understand the illness fully but they know they can’t do it for you, your parents might be feeling helpless to take care of their child, which is really every parents fear.
That said, you absolutely have the right to talk to them about it. These conversations can be very difficult but I would recommend telling them that you understand where they are coming from, acknowledge how they might be feeling, but let them know that you need them to help and support you in a different way. It helps to jot down how you are feeling beforehand so you can pick the points that matter most and only address a few at one time. This can help keep the conversation on track, keep everyone’s emotions to a minimum, and not overwhelm them. Just let them know that this isn’t about anyone doing the wrong thing or right thing, its about you wanting them to be part of your support team and feeling like you need the chance to help them understand what that means for you.
Love back from the diabetes community