Wow, Jessica you sound sooooo much like me. I have been T1 for 21 yrs. I got it really young so my mom took care of me. As I got older I kinda just knew she would take care of me so I never stepped up. I tried, but I didn't really care if I did my best or not because someone was ALWAYS there. So...fast forward. I am 24 now, married and we are wanting to start a family. I have always had high A1C's (like 10+) but never had a bad report on my eyes or my kidneys or anything. That meant that whenever doctors told me of all the potential threats i would just roll my eyes and think how stupid and wrong they were. Well, I just recently went to the eye dr and found out I have macular edema. It comed right before Retinopathy. I FREAKED OUT! I was pretty mad and scared and confused.
I totally get what you are saying about fighting with you mom. My mom and i are great friends but if she nagged me about testing or got on my case because of my sugars, I would get so nasty. I just felt like I knew what I was doing and she should leave me alone. I also had this same feeling toward a lot of my doctors. i hate when they use scare tactics. I think it is so stupid to threaten someone with consequences when they are trying. You didn't get this disease because you made a bad choice or anything. I totally understand where you are coming from.
All I can tell you is that I hope you fine a better way to treat it than I did. I was soooo lucky for so long and now I worry a lot about it all catching up with me. I don't want to be sickly or make life harder for my husband. I don't want to have babies with birth defects. I wish I had found a happy medium earlier! One other thing to be aware of- Diabetes has a lot of chemical influence. I think I was depressed a lot in my teen years. Especially with numbers running that high so often. It made it really hard to care about taking better control or listening to anyone. It really just made it hard to do much of anything. Don't get me wrong, I had a really fun, normal life. I played sports, traveled, had a bunch of friends, but I think i just carried around that burden of depression.
I hope some of this helps you. Feel free to hit me up with questions. I totally don't want to preach to you. I'm not a lecturer, i just read your post and felt like I was listening to myself and the things I wrote are things that had been told to me, but I never heard until now.