Ok. I have to get something super scary off of my chest. Two months ago, I went to my regular optometrist ( think the spelling is right) for my eye exam and to get my prescription update if needed.
Here enters the scary part, So she dialates my eyes and begins the exam. She started in my right eye. Well, as she is shining the ridiculous bright light in my eye... I knew something was up because she was spending a LONG time over there. She backs away from really quickly and says "Well, darling, I have found some spots in your right eye." Yes, she referred to them as "spots." My heart was racing, my whole body spilled into a ridiculous sweat! I asked her what she meant by "spots" in my eye...She said that I needed to see my regular PCP when I could and ask to be referrred to a Retinal Specialist. I couldn't speak at this point. I broke out in tears. This idiot woman is giving me some super scary news and is acting so very casual about it...My husband was waiting in the lobby and I needed him in there so bad at this point. But, by the way she was acting about these "spots" I just couldn't understand why she was being so lax about it. She finally looked in my left eye and that was fine. So, when she is making conversation with me (winch) I was literally replying in squeks. She then does the eye exam where you read the little letters with one eye covered on the wall. I can't EVER remember having my eyes dialated and then doing an eye exam for glasses. I had tears in my eyes and could barely read the damn letters on the wall. Her response? She jotted something down on her stupid little notepad and said "Your eyes have changed DRAMATICALLY since the last time you were here." My first thought was "No crap!" I have tears in my eyes and my vision is blurry because you just dialted them!!
So, I walk out to the lobby where my husband-he knew something was wrong immediately. I could barely make it out of the lobby door before I literally broke down.
We made it to the car and I called my mother and father. I told them what was happening. They cried-I don't know why. They were trying to comfort me and told me they would do whatever they needed to do fix it.
My husband was in shock-this was the first time I think he realized the SERIOUS nature that diabetes can have on a person's body.
I know this is a long post, I apologize.
Anyway, I immediately called my Endo's office. It was on a holiday weekend so no one was available. I left frantic messages on all of their phones. Come the following Monday morning, they called FIRST thing-which I am so thankful for. I had spent my 3 day weekend in misery, depressed, scared, and hopeless. For Godsakes, I paint and am a photographer. I can't lose my eyesight..I did not sleep all weekend. I had severe panic attacks.
My nurse practitioner told me to call this particular eye institute at Vanderbilt here in Nashville. She told me that she would probaly be booked but give it a try. I'm no holy roller, but I had an appointment the very next day. I think God had a hand in that, because someone knew I was suffering.
It turns out, after I went to see this Retinal Specialist ( A God Send of a Medical Dr.) that I do indeed have only 2 spots of signs of "back ground retinopathy" in my right eye only. My left eye was clear. I cried with happy tears and so did my husband. The Dr. even had tears in her eyes!
So, with all of this said, basically high blood sugars that I had been experiencing over the past year...it caused some damage. I had too many things going on at once, and I was neglecting my health. NOT ANYMORE! My health comes FIRST ALWAYS! She did tell me that there was a possibility that these two little spots could just go away on their own. She said that I was going to be A oK. She discussed a few more things with me and I will be going back to her in a year.
Ah...I feel better getting this off my chest.