Feeling the t1d loneliness these days.
Earlier this week, I had a whole conversation about the difference between t1d and t2d with a co-worker, and as soon as I finished explaining, the person answered " yeah but you really shouldn’t eat “xyz” it’s not good for your diabetes", Where I had just explained that there is no amount of healthy eating, exercise or supplement that will cure my diabetes.
Another one saw me with my diabetes bag opened at work and just ran the other way.
It’s not the first time she does that.
Last week, I was in the process of priming my pen and attempting to give myself insulin, and a co-worker wouldn’t give me a minute to do my things, and then a boss came by and they are both going at me like u should do this and that, ( work wise), not giving me a minute to breath or finish what I’m doing, then when I’m done ( and frustrated with their lack of awareness or privacy) the co worker says, " I never knew you were diabetic, you are really cool about this whole insulin and giving yourself shots…" I really wanted to snap back at her, but I just smiled. I realize their lack has nothing to do with my diabetes and all to do with their own being but still.
Today, a girl was explaining to me that she was supposed to do a research paper on diabetes but failed it cuz she just didn’t get it. Diabetes is too complicated.
Today, I was trying to avoid going low all day, and not running too high either. I feel completely wiped out. My friend felt it was all way over her head.
Tonight, My cgm was obvious ( on my lower arm, with short sleeves) and a lot of people made very weird comments about it.
I know in the Grand scheme of things, this all is nothing, but somehow this time it’s getting to me. I’m feeling it a lot.
Maybe it’s a mix of the holidays,
Maybe it’s that I put on 20 pounds in less than 2 months,
Maybe it’s my Endo not being appreciative of all the hard work I have done since my last visit because my a1c is still above 7
And maybe, it is that I’m starting to be more talkative about my journey and challenges lately, hence giving a chance for people to comment. I don’t know.
But tonight, I just can’t get it all out of my head and I’m feeling really alone out there