The not so diabetic police


(Joshy84) #1

We all hate them the diabetic police. The people who tell us you shouldn't eat that, how can you do that with needles I would rather die, blah blah blah and blah. They are annoying. Something lately that has been annoying me is that my wife unless I tell her something is wrong or stuff is going going good, she dont ask.

I guess all I want is a hey how are things going with your diabetes.? I don't want her to be like the diabetic police but I just want her to be a little more caring. Any suggestions?


(Kateski) #2

Maybe she figures you have it under control...  My husband, while being very supportive, doesn't really ask anything.  If he touches my skin and I feel clammy  he will ask if I have tested my blood sugar recently because that usually means I am low...  

Maybe you could both get involved with your local JDRF chapter.  I just started a T1 Meetup group in my area for adults w/ T1, while my husband is not T1, he comes to the meetings and he thinks that it is really cool that we can all share information.  Maybe it would help if you could be involved with something like that together...

I say, just be open and talk to her about it.  Also mention any times in the past that she might have helped you with it and thank her for being there for you etc.

 

 


(BrianPQuinn) #3

I like Kates suggestion. But also have you been open with your signifcant other about the illness? Do you talk about it? Or have you always been more private about things? If that is the case you need to open up more with her and she might seem to show the interest that you want. She may have always had the interest but been conscious of your need or want of privacy.

I more or less kept my family out of the picture. I was very independent and on my own, so they tend to not ask questions. My mom would from time to time, but that just frusted the heck out of me so I would ignore her or snap at her.

If you open yourself up she may very well want to get involved with you, however realize once you open the door, you can't come back complaining about being attacked by your own police officer. :-p


(Joshy84) #4

It's not that I don't talk about it, I try to with her. It just seems the only time she is worried about it is when something has gone wrong, then it feels like she is attacking me. I don't know I just wish their could be a happy medium somewhere. Somewhere she would understand that i'm not always gonna be where I need to be, and that some days I can do everything right but not have the best control because that stuff happens. I've tried to tell her to just ask questions from time to time but not to attack me because no one is perfect, at this.

I don't know, I guess I wish this was a just a smidge easier on everyone >< !


(cdavid1) #5

My boyfriend doesn't really ask about any of it unless I'm in a bad mood. And then he likes to blame it on my blood sugar. He also gets annoyed if he touches my stomach and I say owe. I mean I have a tub in my stomach! Don't touch it! haha


(sarahslp) #6

I try to bring up my D with my husband as kind of an everyday thing, so we don't only discuss it when I'm acting like a lunatic and he's trying to convince me I'm actually low. (:

I'll bring up things like, "Oh, I'm borderline at 150, I wonder if I should correct..." and things like that. I feel like it just reminds him that I'm always thinking about it!


(Kateski) #7

Just out of curiosity... How much insulin would you give yourself at 150?


(DDrumminMan) #8

My wife and I don't discuss it too much.  When I test before driving or someting she'll ask what the result is.  But i can relate to part of what you said.  When I get low or have problems she things it's because I've done something wrong.  She doesn't understand that it's not an exact science.  But she doesn't have it so I can understand how she doesn't understand.  It's a tricky subject I agree.


(rainbow_squid) #9

i find it very annoying that people tell me like o don't eat that (as in cookies cake things like that) and then i tell them i can and they dont believe me


(Eric_Carpenter) #10

How do you react when your wife DOES say something?  I tend to be a very gruff person unless I make a deliberate effort to play nice.  When my wife comments on my sugars I am more likely to be high/low and grouchy about it...so she has had to learn to say what is on her mind and I have had to learn diabetes is no excuse to be rude.  Now we are to the point where I get upset but within 5 minutes I'm following her advice (still working on it).


(Sarah Holbrook) #11

i agree like if i couldn't would i be eating it i have a friend whose sort of strange and every thing she goes you can't have that sarah  , i'm like who has diabeteshere me and if i want ice cream i'll eat it.


(DDrumminMan) #12

[quote user="Eric_Carpenter"]

How do you react when your wife DOES say something?  I tend to be a very gruff person unless I make a deliberate effort to play nice.  When my wife comments on my sugars I am more likely to be high/low and grouchy about it...so she has had to learn to say what is on her mind and I have had to learn diabetes is no excuse to be rude.  Now we are to the point where I get upset but within 5 minutes I'm following her advice (still working on it).

[/quote]

"Yes Dear"

Actually I'm not a gruff person and I understand that she doesn't and can't understand everything about what I have to deal with.  So I just say OK or something and just do what I know I need to do.  She is not the kind of person where being gruff with works. In fact, she's quite the opposite!