As of tomorrow morning I will be going back to MDI!
I went to my endo appointment with my mom today to discuss it and look at my A1C. Since my mom has been involved since I was 6, and I have problems dealing with male authority figures..which often means I don't express what I am thinking, burst into tears from fear of disappointing/failing, and just generally can't speak up when needs..my mom comes with me.especially after my last appointment alone with my endo..which resulted in me bursting tears moments later in her car. (i know i sound like a wussy and really i'm pretty stubborn but this is the result of a childhood trauma).
While sitting in the waiting room, I started to not feel well...so I tested and sure enough I was 4.2...this from the correction at 1050am when I was 19. I had some hard candy, and waited for my level to come back up. By the time I got into his office and we were already half way through my appointment, I had dropped to 3.4 and we had to stop so he could grab me some juice.
We looked at my A1C which is MUCH better than before(7.4) but when I told him, still having a hypo at the time, that I have multiple lows a week, if not a day..and that while my overal control seems to be between 8-10 instead of 8-12(with some highs)..i'm going low more and the actual fluxation in my levels is much greater.
He asked me what I wanted to do, and that either way it was my choice. I always thought he was pro-pump, but I realized in this appointment...he isn't as much as I thought. My mom expressed for me(she knows better than anyone else as I rant to her about the pump all the time, broke down to tears from anxiety the weeks leading up to the pump, and broke down a few times while being on the pump when I was frusterated) how it's not making my life easier, it's harder if anything and I feel more weighed down by my diabetes now.
He pretty much just said, if it's not making my life easier, i'm not liking it and it's giving me such fluxations..that we would try MDI again. I have gotten my A1C down to 7.6 using shots, and he said if anything I just need to keep the same routine I had with the pump..but with shots. That I can manually mimic the pump, and that hopefully I've learnt some good habits from the last three months that I was having trouble with before.
So I'm back to Lantus twice a day, and Novorapid as usual when I eat. My carb ratio is now 1:10 for all meals(whereas on MDI before it was 1:15 for dinner). My correction dose has changed from 1:2.5 to 1:3..as my corrections on the pump always seem to land me going low.
We discussed going onto a different insulin but the other one..starts with an "A"..can't remember what it is though..only comes in pens and I cannot use pens..they freak me out.
So I have to call Animas about a refund and tomorrow morning I will take my Lantus morning dose same as before and remove the pump. We're going to re-visit the idea of the pump next year and see where I'm at/where the technology is. My endo said he'd prefer a pump that adjusted my basal rates itself based on my level.